It was after one a.m. on a very cold New Year’s morning. Outside Nasrudin’s bedroom window, two inebriated revellers were arguing loudly. Nasrudin’s wife shook the Mullah and told him to go outside and stop the noise. Half asleep, Nasrudin trudged downstairs, wrapping himself in his blanket to keep warm. Upon reaching the two drunks outside, he attempted to reason with them. One of them grabbed his blanket and both men ran away. Shivering, Nasrudin collapsed back into bed, whereupon his wife asked, “What were they arguing about?” “It must have been the blanket,” muttered the Mullah. “When they took that, they stopped fighting.”
Monthly Archives: December 2008
It was approaching the New Year when resolutions are made. Nasrudin’s fat curate promised his wife he would lose weight by giving up chocolate, a pleasure he adored. The curate pleaded with Nasrudin to help him keep his resolution. “Very well,” said the Mullah, “Come back on March 1st and I will help you.” Dutifully, the curate kept his appointment two months hence and once again begged Nasrudin to help him give up chocolate. “Do not eat chocolate,” said Nasrudin. “Is that it?” asked the man incredulously. “Yes that is it.” “Why, then did I have to wait two months?” Nasrudin replied, “Because first, I had to give up chocolate.”
Nasrudin was walking down Oxford Street during the post Christmas sales on a particularly chilly, blustery, winter morning when he encountered a rich friend of his. “That is remarkable,” exclaimed the friend. “Here I am wrapped up in my finest, tailored coats and still this blasted weather chills me to the bone. You, Nasrudin, are dressed only in rags, yet you do not seem to notice this freezing wind. Why is that?” The mullah replied, “A man who is wearing all the clothes he owns cannot afford to feel cold.”
Nasrudin was at a village banquet when he spotted a richly attired gentleman stuffing food in his pockets. Confronting the thief, the man exclaimed to Nasrudin, “It is for my wife. She was unable to come so I said I would bring her home some food.”
Without saying a word, Nasrudin opened the man’s pocket and poured a whole pot of hot tea into it.
“What have you done!!” cried the thief.
“When your wife has eaten all that food,” replied Nasrudin, “she will need something to drink.”
Nasrudin went to his window and found sitting on the sill, a bedraggled, very tired, rare peregrine falcon. In fact, it was so rare in those parts, that Nasrudin had never seen such a species in his life. He brought the bushed bird inside remarking, “You poor thing. How on earth did this happen?” Fetching his nail scissors, he clipped the end of the bird’s beak so that it looked straight, cut his talons and trimmed its feathers.
“That is much better. Now you look more like a bird.”
Nasrudin fancied a piece of Web 2.0 action, so he took an interview via Skype. On the other end was the much younger CEO of a startup. “We’re really big on ambition here, remarked the CEO. “What can you do for us?” “I’ll have your job,” Nasrudin replied. “Dude, are you crazy?” cried the CEO. “I may well be, replied the Mullah. “Is that a prerequisite for the job?”
The price of geese was rising sharply in advance of the festive season. Sensing that now was a good time to sell his bird, Nasrudin brought his goose to market. One prospect fancied the fat goose, but the bird hissed at the stranger and frightened him off. A second man attempted to weigh the big bird, but it bit him. A third who had witnessed all this remarked, “Your goose has a foul disposition.” Nasrudin replied, “Now you know why I am selling it.”